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I wake up today have my coffee and read. Waiting for our vet to appointment to get closer. I've been struggling with my dog, Snickers for awhile now. Not with behavior but with health. He's 13.5 and for a German Shepherd dog that is quite old. I took care of him since he was the magical age of 12 weeks. There have been points in time in my life where he's comforted me and took care of me. I'm trying to get ready to say goodbye to him as he's done his absolute best. He's having lots of trouble standing and now doesn't seem to want to stand anymore. This is the hard part to know you make the decision to stop the breath of life and end the suffering of the body. It's not an easy thing to take the life of anything. It's even harder to let them suffer. The body is such a machine in that it wears down and as it heals itself to a point. Inevitably it will break down. It's the natural order of things. Emotionally it's the hardest to accept that my friend is dying. So this is that moment where I have to look back all the way up to right now and know our journey together stops here and we must go our separate ways for now. It's not good bye but for now it's see you later. You must go and live free and not in pain. Let the god of the universe heal you and take the pain away. Let you run like you did in your youth. I will be there when I get there to hug you and love on you.
This here is a fact of life. Our fur babies age much faster than we do. It breaks my heart to see him this way when he was so full of life. I hope that he takes the pain and says well I know I got use of my body. My owner just didn't keep me inside but treated me and respected me for the dog that I am. We get such a short time with our dogs. I wonder if they understand why they feel and seem to age but we don't. I wonder if that registers with them. He's been there for me more times than I can count. I can remember 2:30 in the morning about 7 years ago around this time of year. That a man started banging on my front door and windows. I had just brought my son home as he was a new born. My Snickers had no problem telling that gentleman that this was not the right house to stop by and try and break into. He watched out for me on my late night walks, when I was sick with cancer. He was always there defending the deck from his nemesis the killer squirrels. There's a lot I can say about him. The one thing I can say that I will always hold true to my heart is that he is special. He always wanted to be around me. He was bonded to me more than anyone else. The truth is when people thank me for helping them with their dog. It is Snickers who should be thanked. It was do to having Snickers. He helped me find my passion. I would never have known that the work I was supposed to be doing, helping dogs and helping people if it weren’t for you.
It is weird how you can only see how the map is drawn out when it's complete. Only was I able to connect the dots of what a special dog and where he brought me in my life when it was his sun that was setting.
It was because of him that I felt a calling to help people with their dogs. It's because of him I learned to be father and understand patience and how to use discipline without having emotion or the use of physical spanking. He taught me it's not about emotions as much as it's about teaching the lessons. My Snickers, has taught me ultimately what it meant to be a man. To care for something and to let it care for you. I will always treasure what we had. The walks with no one else around but us. Clearing my head. The evenings where you'd lay your head on me, or out in the garage when I'd work in my work shop you'd just lay there, guarding me of course. We definitely had our ups and downs in the beginning. I wouldn't have changed it for the world. It made me into the man I am today. You helped me make me into the trainer I am today, and father I am today. Most importantly Snickers, you helped me find my true passion. I'm glad you got to see me come full circle as I got to see you come full circle. To my founding member of Patrick Ferland: Dog Training, LLC. You will be forever in my heart. You will be forever missed, you will always be my greatest teacher, and you will forever be my first dog and my best friend.
Thank you for everything. Thank you for the journey you gave me and the path you set me on. I know now as we can't travel in the same direction. I have faith that our paths are destined to cross again.
As the loyal dog's conversation with Jesus goes, "You may pass through the gates you were a loving companion and loved to your fullest". "The dog replies no I can't pass yet". "I'm waiting on someone to meet me". Jesus said " I understand, I'm waiting for all of my people to come as well."
Let your heart ever be full of the loyalty of a dog.